The Prat and The Prude
by Merosroc
Summary: "I bet you found that kiss so enjoyable that you just want me to snog you senseless right here and now, don't you, Granger?" Fluffy one-shot.


**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the magical world of Harry Potter, nor am I associated with it whatsoever. Meh. But, erm, Draco Malfoy is officially my property. I signed the legal papers. He's mine now. And he thinks I'm awesome. Okay, bye.**

**Author's note: Guys, I justed want to share a _very_ important message with you all. I like pie. And turtles. And dolphins. And, okay, I'll stop now.**

* * *

"Granger."

No reply.

"Granger?"

Still no reply.

"GRANGER!"

Yet again, no reply.

"Granger, can I touch your-"

"Don't even _think a_bout going there, Malfoy."

"There, now that I finally have your attention, tell me, what's gotten you into a grumpy mood?"

*Silence*

"Granger."

"Go away."

"Grangerrr..."

"Go away, Malfoy."

"Granger, Granger, GRANGER!"

"I SAID GO AWAY, YOU DERANGED PUPPET!"

"What's wrong, Granger? Something bothering you, Granger? What's got your knickers in a twist, Granger?"

"Malfoy, I think it would be best if you would just mind your own business and_ leave me alone_."

"Not a chance, Granger. Now spill."

"Spill what?"

"The beans."

"Why would I want to throw up what I had for breakfast?"

"Isn't that a muggle expression? You're _supposed_ to know what it means."

"Of course I know what it means, you twit, I just don't want to tell you."

"Why not?"

"Because you're an annoying oaf!"

"Ouch. PMS?"

"Malfoy, this isn't the time."

"PMS it is, then."

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Malfoy. Go drown yourself in the Black Lake for all I care!"

"You know, that sounds like a great idea, Granger. I'm pretty sure the Giant Squid would make quite a lovely companion, unlike you. You're no fun at all."

"Fun? FUN? We're Heads, Malfoy. We're not supposed to have fun. We're supposed to make sure that everyone is strictly following the school rules and that everything is in order. We're also supposed to – "

"And you've just proven my point."

"Fine, Malfoy! Whatever floats your boat!"

"My boat? Merlin's beard, Granger. Are you implying that –"

"I'm not implying anything!"

"Then?"

"Forget it, Malfoy, just forget it. WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO BACK TO SNOGGING PANSY?"

"What do you – wait, is that _jealousy _I hear, Granger?"

"Jealous? Me? Merlin, Malfoy. Are you sane?"

"I know for a fact that tone of voice you used with me when you told me to go back to snogging Pansy had a hint of jealousy in it."

"I am not jealous!"

"Oh, but you are. Still thinking about our kiss on Christmas, Granger? You know that didn't mean anything. We got caught under the mistletoe and –"

"I _know_ that, Malfoy! I wasn't thinking about it!"

"Oh, but you were. You must have enjoyed it, didn't you?"

"I most definitely did not. What made you think that I –"

"Oh, but you most definitely did, Granger. I bet you found it so enjoyable that you just want me to snog you senseless right here and now, don't you?"

"Malfoy!"

"But of course, you wouldn't admit it since you're such a prude. No wonder you still aren't dating Weasel-bee, you're too cowardly to make the first move."

"I am _not_ –"

"You're a prude, Granger."

"I am not a prude!"

"Yes, you are! You wouldn't even let me touch your-"

"If you complete that sentence, Malfoy, I swear I will not hesitate to hex-"

"Pansy would've loved it if I-"

"Shut up, Malfoy!"

"See what I mean? You're jealous _and _you're a prude. Actually, you're the Queen Prude, Prudey McPrudeson-"

"Malfoy-"

"Prudenise, Le Prude, Prude McPrudes-a-lot, Pru-"

"I'm warning you, Malfoy, if you won't stop that, I'm going to-"

"Prudean, Prudeney, Prudenacan, Prudi-"

"Alright then, you have left me with absolutely no choice!"

And with that being said, Hermione grabbed Draco's face, angled it at the right forty-five degrees (the Hermione thing to do), and kissed him smack dab on the lips.

Hermione pulled away after a few seconds to find a very shocked Draco Malfoy.

"What's wrong, Malfoy? Why aren't you saying anything? Crookshanks got your tongue? Well_, good_. I am _not_ a prude nor am I jealous, is that understood? _Now_, I'm just going to go up to my room and we're just going to pretend that this never happened, okay? Okay. Good Night, Malfoy."

Just as Hermione was about to turn to walk towards her room, Draco unexpectedly called her out.

"Hey, Granger?"

"Yes, my dear ferret?"

"You're still a prude."

"And you're still a prat, Malfoy. Always."

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***Imagines Snape barging in and being all like "YOU STOLE MY LINE!"***

**Haha. :D**

**Anyway, reviews pretty please? With Draco Malfoy on top?**

**Oh, oh, oh, and please read my Dramione multi-fic called Merciless too.**

**Thank you for reading! (:**

**P.S. If any of you are interested in getting updates on when I'll be uploading new stories, feel free to follow me on Tumblr (link is on my profile).**

**Adios. ^^**


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